Andi's Life & Probably MORE than you need to know!

I think that pretty much sums everything up in the title...

Friday, January 13, 2006

"FAT and HAPPY!"

I am on endeavor to lose the weight I've accomplished to put on only after losing it all after my children. Well, I had almost lost it all, I had gotten down to 135lbs and was being told I was getting too skinny. What to do! AH!

Years ago.... when I got pregnant the first time I weighed about 118lbs and was told by Kerri's(cant remember her last name) mom "Thank god I put some weight on I always looked sick." She went to HS with us 1 year younger took over being the mascot for me when I could no longer do it. I really did'nt want to be put on display in front of the whole Wyandotte population at a football game being known as the "pregnant Bear" for the rest of my life. Not that the whole population is so overwhelming but rumors fly fast there and well ya know, I had more people knowing I was getting a divorce there before I knew and I didn't even live there anymore! Ha ha ha! Anyways I said all that for someone to hopefully remember her name.... It is like it is on the tip of my tongue.

Anywho... being told at 135lbs I was getting too skinny was so weird, I thought I was starting to look pretty good. So I gained a few more lbs and found at about 145lbs I was filled out a little more and received more compliments, so I suppose that will be my goal to reach again.

I have been on a diet for almost 2 months now and believe I have only lost around 8-10 lbs. I think I have lost more inches that anything because bracelets I could not wear are now fitting around my wrists again. Do you hear that! BRACELETS! Damn.... I don't care about my stupid wrists! I guess that is a positive sign but still, I was looking for my Butt to decrease not the wrists!

Last weekend we were taking my daughter out to eat for her 15th birthday at Lambert's Resteraunt, Home of the Throwed rolls. I was getting ready and went in to ask my daughter how I looked because ever since she could talk she would tell me if I looked ok. She is always completely honest with me and I love that. Even at an early age if I looked fat in something she would say "Momma Fat Cow!" LOL... I know sounds cruel, but not her fault. I used to stand in front of my mirror when she was young if I looked badly in something I would say "God, I am a fat cow!" So I guess it was a learned enviroment, I suppose anyways. So, I asked my daughter if I looked ok to go out to eat and she responded "Yeah Mom, you look pretty and look like you have lost weight." I was so excited to hear that come out of her mouth she said she was proud of me. I told her "Thank you that means alot since I had been trying so hard to get back down from this awful weight I have put on." My daughter then proceeded to tell me "Well you know, it is known that people that are happy tend to put weight on hence the phrase "Fat and Happy!". Of course I did know this because I use it all the time, it does especially apply to me. heehee.

I keep pictures of me skinny on my refrigerator to steer me away from eating. My daughter told me how much she weighed last weekend, 130lbs. I died, I went to my refrigerator and showed her a picture with me and all my kids, and I said "I weighed 5lbs more than you in this picture". Boo Hoo!
She said "Wow mom, get back down so we can share clothes!". I would love that but do not see it happening.

So yesterday I was in Carthage and went to buy a new bra, I ended up at Fashion Bug and found only 1 bra for my size and I bought it. It is definately one of the most uncomfortable bras I have ever managed to purchase. I hate that, bring it home and put it on... AH! it sucks! I guess it is one of the prices you pay I suppose for being overweight. I can't wait to get this weight off and get back to my old self, whoever that is, it so hidden beneath all this fat. Even if I get down within 10 - 20lbs of my goal I think I will be happy.

So CHEERS to all the "Fat and Happy" people out there!

1 Comments:

  • At 6:09 AM, Blogger Redneck Diva said…

    Kari Garman is her name.

    When we graduated I weighed a whole 113 and found out later that my mother honestly thought I had an eating disorder. There was no disorder, just plain ol', flat out starvation! I remember eating nothing but carrot sticks and SlimFast all day long. Bleh.

    I am now "fat and happy" as you say and am fine with my image of my body, but I know that I'm not healthy and I really need to do something about that. Paul likes me the way I am, I feel sexy in my own right, but those doctor people with the medical degrees seem to think that all this weight is a bad thing, lol!

    If only we could be fat, happy and healthy, huh.

     

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